New office etiquette: How to be polite and well liked at the office

Anyone who works in an office knows that those close quarters can spell trouble. You spend a lot of time with your coworkers, and, even if you have your own office, you interact in meetings, breakrooms, bathrooms, hallways, and other common areas. You work together on teams and on projects. You sit in meetings and brainstorming sessions together. You have to work together, be together, and get along. How hard can it be?

Very hard, it turns out. Being polite and professional at work can be difficult, especially now with everyone texting, tweeting, and talking all the time. New technologies mean new rules of etiquette.

Why is etiquette important at work? Because etiquette is very important to career success. Generally speaking, successful people get along well with others and are well liked. And one of the best ways to do that is to be courteous and respectful to others. So think of these new etiquette rules as keys to success:

Put your phone away. There's a time and place for your phone to be out, but it's not during a meeting, a conference, a networking event, or lunch with colleagues or associates. Take your phone off the table—literally—and save the texting, tweeting, and updates for after work or on your break.

If your phone is on the table you send the signal that you are ready and willing to be interrupted. If you are looking at your screen, tapping away, or, worse, talking during a meeting or luncheon you send the message that you aren't listening and that what is happening around you is not as important as what's on your screen or who you are talking to. It's disrespectful.

Turn it off. It's not enough to take your phone off the table and put it away; you need to turn off the ringer, too. During the day, turn your ringer off and set your phone to vibrate. Do you really want your co-workers to hear your honking ring tone?

Don't overshare. Unless you have become close friends with colleagues, keep your weekend fun and family pics to yourself. No one wants to scroll through your weekend photos from Six Flags. In the age of the Internet, we are all over-sharers. Resist the urge.

Beware your Twitter feed. Remember, everything you post or tweet or e-mail can potentially be seen by others, so be very careful what you put out there. What's posted on Facebook rarely stays on Facebook. Blogging about your drunken weekend or annoying coworker? Not a good idea. Imagine that your boss or coworkers will see everything you post or send; this will help you be more selective. Play it safe—never, ever post or send anything that you don't want the world to see or that could hurt your career.

Be careful using social media with colleagues. This is a super tricky one. Social media sites like Facebook can become a minefield where, as PsychologyToday put it, "The etiquette of little, inconsequential acts become mammoth." Hurt feelings and repercussions may ensure if you friend one colleague and not another, or endorse one colleague's skills on LinkedIn and not another's. Some experts say that it's best to have a blanket policy of not accepting friend requests from anyone you work with, but what if you become good friends and you want to friend them?

The answer is to be cautious and judicious. You should be able to connect with people you genuinely like and not have to connect with those you don't. Easier said than done, I know, but just use social media with caution and be aware of potential conflicts and repercussions. It may be harmless to accept a friend request from a colleague whom you don't particularly care for, especially if the hurt feelings might hurt the work environment. After all, you can always adjust your settings so you don't get their feed. But I would be careful about endorsing someone's skills on a site like LinkedIn unless you really mean it.

Like technology itself, workplace etiquette is evolving. But one thing stays the same: successful people tend to be well liked, and well-liked people tend to be polite, so be polite and play nice at the office. 

Resolve to re-try: 5 tips to get back on track for your resolutions

By now, most New Year’s resolutions have been forgotten or abandoned. Maybe you still have that Post-it note on the fridge that says, “Eat more veggies,” or that notecard on your desk that says, “Take a Photoshop class,” or that sign on your door that says, “Exercise more.”

Don’t fret. We’ve all been there. But don't give up just yet. Yes, we’re four months into the year, but there is still plenty of time to meet your goals or make new ones, if you really want to. Here are five tips to help you get back on track and to set resolutions and goals that stick:

1. Re-establish your goal. Don't beat yourself up. Decide to make a clean start and move forward. Do you still want to lose weight, exercise more, take a professional development class, spend more time with the kids, go to church, volunteer more, join a book club, etc.? What did you want to do, and do you still want to do it? Don't be beholden to the goal you set on January 1. You can always tweak that goal or set a new one.

2. Consider why your original resolution failed. What were the obstacles that kept you from your goal? Was it the wrong goal for you? Did you not have the time? Did you lose interest? Did something else present itself? By looking at the reasons you weren't able to stick to the resolution, you might be able to determine what didn't work for you and what you can do to change that.

3. Make sure your goal is specific. Many goals fail because they aren't specific enough. For example, the goal of losing weight is actually fairly nebulous. How much weight? Five pounds or 20? And by when? Is there a size you want to be? If your goal is to exercise more, what exactly does that mean? Once a week? Three times a week? And for how long? When setting your goal, be as specific as possible: I want to lose 15 pounds by November 1; I want to be proficient in Photoshop by September 1; I want to exercise three times a week; etc.

4. Be realistic. The best way to meet a goal is to be realistic about it. Don't bite off more than you can chew. Losing 50 pounds by your high school reunion in September isn't realistic. Becoming fluent in German by the time you go to Munich for Oktoberfest probably won't happen. Getting up at 4 a.m. to exercise might not work for you. Your goal should be realistic, attuned to your lifestyle, the time you have, your financial constraints, etc. Don't set yourself up for failure by making a goal that is impossible to achieve.

5. Develop a game plan. Once you have a specific, realistic goal you can develop a specific game plan to meet it. Back away from it and then break it down to its moving parts so that you can figure out how to achieve it. Factor in all the things that have to happen and all the things you might need to make this work, from child care to transportation to equipment you might need, to when you will be able to study, etc. 

For example, if your goal is exercise three days a week for 30 minutes, figure out when, how, and where you will exercise. Then, get out your calendar and schedule it. Make it a standing appointment. If your goal is take a class, figure out your schedule, then get on-line immediately and find one. If your goal is to lose weight, figure out how you will do it: Weight Watchers? Counting calories? Atkins? Whatever method you choose, be sure you understand what it will take to make it work and how you will go about it on a daily basis.

It’s never too late to jump start that old New Year’s resolution or set a new goal for the year. If your goal is specific and realistic with a realistic game plan to back it up, your chances of success are terrific. Good luck!

Leadership Greater Washington's Volunteer of the Year!!

I am humbled to be the recipient of Leadership Greater Washington’s 2013 Pepco Volunteer of the Year Award.

I have served on the board of Leadership Greater Washington (LGW) for the past five years—this year as chair-elect and co-chair of Youth Leadership Greater Washington. LGW is a terrific organization, one that connects and trains leaders from across the Washington area’s diverse cultures of business, politics, government, nonprofits, and more. LGW builds and connects Washington’s leaders so that they may continue to make positive change in the region.

LGW offers three fantastic programs: the Signature Program for leaders; the Effective Leadership Institute, a six-month leadership development program; and Youth Leadership Greater Washington, a six-month interactive youth leadership development program. All have the same purpose: to encourage, train, and connect our region’s leaders so that they may work together to continue to make our region great.

Find out more about LGW here: http://www.lgwdc.org/cs/home

LGW means a lot to me, and I am thrilled to have received this award. Thanks LGW!

Here I am, third from left, at the LGW Gala Event Wednesday night, with: Julie Rosenthal, president of Rosenthal Communications and LGW board chair; Debbie Jarvis, Vice President, Corporate Citizenship and Social Responsibility, Pepco; me; and Tim Kime, president and CEO, Leadership Greater Washington.

Spring clean your professional persona: 7 tips to get going

Spring has sprung, and we all know what that means: spring-cleaning! Time to air out the house, put away the wool sweaters, pack the down comforters, and generally tidy things up from the long winter.

Spring is a natural time for renewal and rejuvenation, so why not take inspiration from the things you do around the house and spring clean your professional persona as well?

We often wait until there is a crisis or an issue that forces us to review our professional selves, so why not get out ahead of things and give your professional life a good spring-cleaning too?

1. Update your resume. Even if you aren't in the market for a job, it’s a good idea to have a current resume handy. So get it out, dust it off, and take a look: What’s changed? What needs updating? Anything to add, remove, or change, like references, phone numbers, or e-mail addresses? How about affiliations and volunteer work? Give your resume a good once over.

2. Update your LinkedIn profile. Even if you use LinkedIn a lot, it’s a good idea to take a few minutes to actually read your profile and do the same thing with your resume: what needs updating? What needs to be added? How is your headshot?

3. Ditto for the Facebook page. Any posts or pictures that you want to add or take down? Maybe take this opportunity to adjust your settings so you get fewer notifications in your in-box. Do you really need all those close friend notifications?

4. Look at your Twitter feed. How is your profile? Your picture? How are your tweets? Check your settings. Are your tweets linked to your Facebook page and vice versa? Do you want them to be?

5. Go through your work clothes. Put away the winter things and get out your spring and summer clothes. Try everything on. What needs to go to Goodwill and what stays? If things don't fit, is it worth altering them? Look at your wardrobe. Does it say, “I am a valued professional”? Or does it say, “I need help”? Clothes are important, so take the time to look at your wardrobe with a critical eye. Are your clothes helping you or hurting you?

6. Organize your office. Take a look at your desk and office. Whether you work in an office or at home, you need a clean, well-organized workspace. Take a look at your desk. What can you do to de-clutter and streamline it? What can you file away or get rid of?

7. Clean out/organize computer files. De-clutter your computer desktop and files as well. Can you streamline your desktop and dock? What do you really need to keep there? Can you use an external storage system or put files in the cloud? Can you find what you need easily?

Spring is a great time to get organized and make a fresh start for the rest of the year. So take some time to spring-clean your professional persona, and you’ll be re-energized.