Memory tips: How to remember someone's name

Memory tips come in handy when networking, especially when it comes to remembering someone's name. It's flattering to someone when you remember their name, and it helps you put them in your mental database of contacts.


Here are six tips to help you remember someone's name:



1. Repetition, repetition, repetition. When first introduced, repeat your new acquaintance's name. First, repeat it directly. "It's nice to meet you, Tom. How do you do?" Then repeat it twice during the course of your conversation. Using their name while conversing will help cement it into your memory—but don't overdo it, or you'll seem odd.


2. Association/Mnemonics. Anchor their name to a particular feature. In your mind, a simple "Tom" might become "Tom with the eyebrows," "Tom wearing blue," or "Tom with the crazy hair." Next time you see them, that feature will remind you of their name.


3. Rhyme it. Try making a simple rhyme out of their name. This can be as silly as you like because, remember, it only needs to make sense to you. Tom could be "Tom went to the prom."


4. Ask someone else. If you forget, discreetly ask a mutual friend. You needn't be embarrassed. It's far better to do this than to call them by the wrong name.


5. Introduce them to someone else. Introduce your new acquaintance to a friend to prompt them to give their own name: "Have you met Peter? He's a good friend of mine from the polo club." Hopefully they will introduce themselves, giving you the opportunity to hear their name again.


6. Just ask. If all else fails, simply ask them again. Politely say, "I'm terribly sorry, I've forgotten your name." Everyone forgets names from time to time, so don't be embarrassed, and don't make a big deal of it.

Get real and get ahead: Five steps to professional authenticity

Believe it or not, authenticity is one of the cornerstones of success. Being authentic means being honest and genuine, which in turn engenders trust and accountability. People respond to people who feel “real” to them. Nobody likes a phony, and people get nervous and mistrustful when they can’t “read” a person. If people read you as authentic, they will trust you, value you, and look to you for leadership and guidance.

Authenticity is about how you conduct yourself, how you treat others, and the way you work and fit in to your corporate culture. It’s not about being nicey-nice or insincere; it’s about being real. Authenticity entails an emotional equation of:

Confidence + Self-awareness + Transparency + Consistency = Authenticity

In other words, authenticity is about establishing and showing an honest and consistent alignment between your personality, your words, and your actions. Much like other personal and professional skills, authenticity can be developed. Here are five ways to develop your authenticity:

1. Be honest. This does not mean you can be rude or disrespectful. You can be honest and still be respectful, diplomatic, and professional. The key is to express yourself well and use kind, constructive, and inclusive language. Here is where verbal skills like using “and” instead of “but” come into play; anytime you use “but” you risk alienating and making people feel defensive. Try to use inclusive, constructive words instead of negative ones. This isn’t being false; it’s framing the discussion in a forward-thinking way.

2. Engage other people. In order to be authentic, you have to care about more than just yourself, so it is important to engage other people. Look people in the eye when you speak to them. Ask questions. Practice reflective listening. Really listen to what they tell you. Resist the temptation to talk about yourself.

3. Treat everyone with respect. Treating other people well is the surest sign of someone who is confident, collected, and genuine. Be gracious, polite, and respectful to everyone, from the janitor to the vice president, from the secretaries to the barristas, from your co-workers to the garage attendants.

4. Test yourself. Becoming more aware of your self, how you operate in the world, how you behave, and how you impact people is the key to using your authentic self in business. A good way to learn about yourself is to take a personality test like the Meyers-Briggs. That test and others like it are an excellent tool for self-awareness, as long as you get the proper training around the assessment. Make sure a professional is able to go over the results with you so you can understand and use the information properly.

5. Look at others. Studying traits of successful but authentic business people is also a good way to understand what being real looks like. For example, here are three very different authentic leaders: Richard Branson, Warren Buffett, and Donald Trump. They each approach life and work very differently, yet you can tell that they are all passionate about what they do. They are consistent in their words, deeds, and ambitions. They are not apologetic about who they are and they integrate their personal qualities into their work life, personal life, and leadership.

Being authentic means you are honest and real. It means you are trusted and counted on. And it can mean all the difference in your success at work and in business.